A is for Asshole (a first approximation)

Alan P. Scott - Verses

A Newbie's Garden of Verse, Chapter 1

A is for Assholes
from AOL-com

B is for Bboards
Like this one I'm on.

C is for Clueslessness
Rampant and free

D is for DNS--
What could that be?

E is for Email
A new place for spam!

F is for FTP;
Often, I am

G is for Gopher
A tool I don't use

H is for Help
Another tool I don't use

I is for IBM
Grounds for rejection

J is for JPEG
I've got a collection

K is for Killfile
You're in it, I bet

L is for Lusers
All over the 'Net

M is for Microsoft
Trustbusters scared of it.

N is for Netiquette
Huh? Never heard of it.

O is for Online
More often than not

P is for Porn
Every teenager's got

R is for Read the FAQ?
Who's got the time?

S is for Sysadmin
He's got the time.

T is for T1
Built right to my door

U is for Unsubscribe
Whatever for?

V is for Vi,

W, W,
W... megs o'bull

X is for X-rated
What the 'Net's for!

Y is for Yes
When it asks "Are you sure?"

Z is for Zappa, and Zenith, and zits
And zebras and Zulus and nonZero bits
And everything else on the 'Net 'cause it fits!

Now you've heard all of my new alphabet
Now I know everything
I'm on the 'Net!

©1997, 1999 Alan P. Scott. All rights reserved.

Last updated August 12, 1999.

Contact me: