What to do if YOU are sick
Date: Fri, 9 Apr 99 14:35:26 -0000 Subject: FEL-L: E-friends
I e-mailed Gary, list owner, privately about this, and he suggested I bring it up to the list. What brought it to mind was Dawn's post the other day about e-friends.
We deal with each other on a day to day basis, though many of us haven't met face to face. We may even become friends, at a distance. What is netiquette, should a member of this group become disabled in one way or another? Do we send private messages? If something...irreversible...should happen to someone, what about the cats?
This came up, actually, a few times on another list. One woman never said a word, then we get a post from her daughter saying she was dying of cancer. We have an emergency fund on that list, so we had a mechanism in place for a condolence collection, and we sent a flower arrangement. Another woman had a sudden, massive heart attack. She did rescue, and it was the middle of rescue season. We took up a collection, activated FUR (feline underground railroad), and divided up the cats.
I understand people wanting to stay anonymous, but I'm thinking about the families, and the cats. Any feedback? Debbie
Date: Fri, 9 Apr 1999 16:57:45 -0500 Subject: RE: FEL-L: E-friends
I would like to suggest that part of your estate planning is writing out a will on what to do with the cats, lock it in your safe deposit box, and give instructions that it is to be opened when you are no longer able to tend to yourself. Appoint someone you trust as executor. Specify in there who is to be contacted, what they are to be told, and who gets which exotics. It would be great to make those arrangements with the individuals by phone before they are needed to be put into motion.
We don't like to think about death and taxes but they do happen. You may seek to honor the ones agreeing to take the animals as the "godparents," and ideally have a test meeting to see if the animal takes a "shine" to the prospective new daddy/mommy.
Date: Fri, 09 Apr 1999 15:45:21 -0700 Subject: Re: FEL-L: E-friends
Hate to play the lawyer here, but that is what I am. ;-)
As far as wills go, just recognize that not all states recognize "holographic" wills (ones that are written by hand and not signed in front of witnesses, and notarized signatures of the witnesses), and some states insist on different numbers of witnesses. I agree whole heartedly that people should plan a head.
The primary reason I am not squeamish about thinking about death is because when I was 18 my parents made me the personal representative under their wills. It really freaked me out, and I told them that I didn't want to think about them dying. Mom calmly told me that she planned on being around for a long time, but that she loved all of us kids enough that she wanted to do what she could to make life easier for us during what was going to be a rough time (hers and/or dad's death). Writing wills was one way of making things easier.
I never forgot that statement, and I am glad to say I still have my parents, and haven't had to deal with that problem personally yet. But having dealt with many clients who have had to deal with a "no will" situation - I also recommend writing wills to everyone.
I'll now step down off my little soap box. :-) Marti
Date: Sat, 10 Apr 1999 15:11:02 -0700 Subject: FEL-L: Wills and caring for our friends "afterward"
>what to do with the cats, lock it in your safe deposit box
Rather than a safe deposit box, which needs a court order to open, I put my will on file with the Trust Department at a local bank (the TD does have to be named in the will as caring for some part of your estate, or they won't be interested in keeping the will, so I have a small part of my insurance money going into a trust fund) and the bank then has a person who checks the newspaper every day
Once the newspaper reader sees your name, the bank will take care of getting your will into Probate