This page is designed by a totally derainged piano tuner, (as if there's any other kind) that's been in the business entirely too long. (being raised by alien's helped) To get the fullest effect of this nonsense, you'll need a sound card, and some other stuff capable of doing the .wav file thing.
Some pianos have a very distinct sound to them. You could sit at them and play them blind
folded (providing you're not already blind, but then you wouldn't be reading this stupid
page now would you) and tell what brand piano it was. The Beau Dahnker is just such a
piano. It has that warm wholesome country sound that is unmistakably unique to this piano.
At this time the Beau Dahnker comes in two colours, Swiss Brown and of course the ever
popular Sat In Black finish. We feel both should get a blue ribbon for clarity and durability.
There are a few models to choose from, and I hope you'll find these sound samples of their
country charm pleasing and tempting enough for you to consider having one of these exquisite
instruments in your living arrangements.(some people live under a bridge eh??)
The Orchestral Spinette. A poopular choice of the young and growing family living in
affordable accomodations. It takes the least amount of space and yet provides the basics
for learning and achieving the skills neccessary to advance to a better piano some day. It
never needs regulation, (nobody ever does anyway) and probably will only "need" a tuning
every decade or so. Should you decide later that the piano is just in the way or nobody plays
it any more and so why have it in the house, go ahead and store it on your front porch or in
your unheated garage.........that's what everyone else does. It may slightly affect the
structural integrity and therefore never really hold a good tuning should you decide to put it
back in a civil location, but then no one's listening that close to a beginner anyway.
A sound byte of the Beau Dahnker Orchestral Spinette
The Conservatory Consolina. Fabulous craftsmanship thoughout, exquisite cabinetry and the
pride and workmanship of the gifted and talented (though they be stupid and under paid)
workers at the Beau Dahnker piano factry. You might say this piano sounds like a well
voiced Orchestral Spinette.
A sound byte of the Beau Dahnker Conservatory Consolina
Introducing the Beau Dahnker Cigar Smoker's (Parlour) Grand
The 9' 2" grand we have is the largest concert grand made this side of the barnyard. It
features the finest wool from our own flock of privately fed organic sheep, and some of the
highest quality of leather tanned the old fashioned way, by ourselves, using the simplest of
time tested methods. The keys are covered with ivory like Boverine@. It rivals the real thing
and is the rage of piano players everywhere. We're proud of this product and we hope you'll
consider seeking out your nearest dealer to take a few moments to graze and play these fine
instruments. This sound byte is a pretty good example of the resounding "belch o' the bass"
in this massive instrument.
Introducing the "Belch 'o the Bass" Beau Dahnker Concert Grand
Don't let other piano dealers give you any manure about it. All in all, the Beau Dahnker
piano is hand and hoof above the rest of the heap. The next time you decide to compost a
new song, or milk some talent, we hope you'll consider the responsive nature of the
Alfalphamatic action of the Beau Dahnker piano and the resounding
reply from your prodding of the keys on these fabulously hand crafted instruments. There
isn't another piano made that can say they are as outstanding in their fields as the Beau
Dahnker.
Here's some customer comments we've encountered over the years.
Was bowled over by the sonorous resonance of the Dahnker concert grand as
herd on your page!
The bass passages were udderly divine.
Has the Dahnker concert grand ever been used in a recording of Beethoven's
Pastoral Symphony?
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At this time we have a 5.5 foot grand that is our best effort thus far. If features some of the
usual technical array of sales splatter that is bestowed upon the unsuspecting buyer when
they shop for pianos. Since the artiste that we asked to do the sound byte for us didn't
show when we were ready for it, I simply did this Etude d'Glissando, circa 1720, kershal
number 279, or something like that.